DOMestic Bdsm and Female Domination

slavemale88 asked:

>if any of you might know of any websites which contain slave
>contracts which specifically describe punishment

No I don't. I also don't think it's the best way to set a D/s
contract up.

I use a general contract in which the sub has agreed to all or
any forms of discipline which may be lawful between consenting
adults; and a provision that I may from time to time make
specific regulations with specific punishments (depending on
circumstances) within this framework.

This gives much better flexibility than having fixed punishments
for fixed occasions.

Joro

slavemale88 wrote:

>what is your favorite punishment of submales. Or for submales,
>what is the most severe punishment you fear

The best punishment for my slave is to just ignore him. That is
worse than any kind of physical pain.... he hates when he has
displeased me, which is not very often. But I have found to
ignore him is the worst thing I can do.

Just my opinion as always,

With sadistic affection

Ms. Irish

I must say I agree with Ms Irish. Well said. I believe it is
all about knowing your sub/slave.

One sub/slave's punishment is another's pleasure. Mine enjoys
pain and humiliation. That makes punishment of him challenging
at times.

By learning and knowing his mind I have found that turning him
away and my disappointment are the biggest punishments I can
inflict.

http://soladysevere.com

Googling the terms "slave contract bdsm" (quotes used to set off
phrase, omit them in your search). This search brought back over
40,000 hits and I got tired after scanning the first thousand.
Of the 1000 hits I scanned at least half had sample contracts.
Anyone for drinking from a fire hose?

Also "Jo Robinson" / Joro wrote:

>I use a general contract in which the sub has agreed to all or
>any forms of discipline which may be lawful between consenting
>adults; and a provision that I may from time to time make
>specific regulations with specific punishments (depending on
>circumstances) within this framework.

I do not know where "Jo" lives but for the USA and the EU the
above is grossly misleading from a laws on the books and a
technical legal point of view. Most forms of "discipline" in our
community involve assault (I say I am going to hit you) and
battery (I actually hit you).

It is well tested case law i.e EU Spanner Decision that a
citizen CAN NOT give consent to assault or battery except in
certain controlled ritualized events,i.e professional football,
boxing, being treated by a doctor or dentist. And while it may
be true that in some communities you might find a judge who is
enlightened enough to say "I know spousal abuse when I see it
and I know the difference between that and heavy consensual BDSM
play, do you really want to bet the next 20 years of your life
on finding such a judge?

In fact, unless you have an enlighten judge, all defense
evidence regarding life style, BDSM play can be and frequently
is ruled to be inadmissible at trial because "You can't give
consent to assault".

And if the moderator will allow me a few moments on my
soapbox.... It is because these laws are on the books, that our
community is soooooo easily marginalized and threatened by
mainstream society. Yes, how easily could you tell the
difference between spousal abuse and consensual BDSM, if the
abused partner had become convincingly complicit out of fear?

Unfortunately the only solution I've been able to think of is
for the community to set up education and certification like
scuba diving and like activities. However given the iconoclastic
nature of community members this idea goes over like a lead
balloon.

To date, I've had to be creative and have found remote control
TENS and dog collars particularly effective as a means of taking
discipline out of the bedroom, into the street and not being
arrested for it. Whenever I think of taking discipline out of the
bedroom, I am reminded of the line from show Hill Street Blues
"Now remember, be careful out there".

Cheers
Tom Zed

punishment, type, severity, Dom/sub feelings

Hello,

On this topic I have a feeling that some folk (like me) tend to
talk about apples while other folk talk about oranges.

slavemale88 wrote:

>what is your favorite punishment of submales.

By asking about favourites, I wonder if slavemale88 wanted to
know which forms of discipline gives the ladies the most
pleasure to inflict?

OK slavemale88 also asked the sub-males which one they fear
most, but the dominant ladies focused their answers on what is
the "worst" punishment they can inflict rather than the ones
they enjoy inflicting.

There was no discussion of the mutual pleasure that both parties
can get from the process of crime and punishment.

I wonder if the subject of "slave contract and punishments"
meant that slavemale88 was actually interested in defining some
things he can be forbidden doing, and defining some forms of
discipline that would be applied if he subsequently did them.

Darlyn/Ms. Irish wrote:

>The best punishment for my slave is to just ignore him.

Best for whom? Does it give either of you any pleasure?

>That is worse than any kind of physical pain....

That is true for me too, much worse than pain. So that makes it
worst not best for us.

It is much worse for both of us, as it's not an effective means
of communication and doesn't do anything to enhance or improve
either of our lives. So no point including such a behaviour
pattern into our relationship.

>he hates when he has displeased me, which is not very often.

Same here. Which is why I don't do it at all, well not if I can
possibly avoid it.

So how can we get the fun of punishment? Surely not by ignoring
each other. Our way is to know through communication what we
each like and find ways to include it in our lives.

I like the idea that I'm forbidden certain things, and that I
will be disciplined for them. For want of better terms I'll call
that crime and punishment. One way of defining the crimes and
the punishments is to have a contract or agreement.

>But I have found to ignore him is the worst thing I can do.

Yep, that's definitely the worst thing I think anybody can do to
me in a relationship. But I think you also have other fun ways
of giving your sub discipline, as I seem to remember you've
mentioned the fact he's a pain slut here in the past.

Lady Severe wrote:

>One sub/slave's punishment is another's pleasure. Mine enjoys
>pain and humiliation. That makes punishment of him challenging
>at times.

Surely not? Surely once you know what he likes, you only need to
both find ways for him to commit acceptable and enjoyable crimes
so that you can give him the punishment he craves?

>By learning and knowing his mind I have found that turning him
>away and my disappointment are the biggest punishments I can
>inflict.

True, but what would be the point? Surely it would be more fun
to find ways to define things he can be punished for in ways
that you enjoy punishing?

slavemale88 wrote:

>for submales, what is the most severe punishment you fear

The one I enjoy fearing the most is Christine's thick red
handled cane. The canes I enjoy fearing (not quite so much) are
any of the thinner canes, and getting any of them isn't so bad,
but still painful and punishment.

The one punishment that would signal that something was going
seriously wrong with our relationship would be my Mistress
ignoring me.

Tom Zed wrote:

>Googling the terms "slave contract bdsm" (quotes used to set
>off phrase, omit them in your search). This search brought back
>over 40,000 hits

You'll get a lot less hits on the search engine on DOMestic. But
the results you'll get will probably be a lot more relevant.

Free search of at least 3 months is at:-

http://u4ds.com/

Members can search all 12 years of DOMestic at:-

http://www.mschristine.com/DOMestic/search.htm

You'll find lots on punishment and contracts there.

>in some communities you might find a judge who is enlightened
>enough to say "I know spousal abuse when I see it and I know
>the difference between that and heavy consensual BDSM play

True. I remember there was at least one consensual bdsm case
that came to court in the UK after the Spanner case. The judge
threw the case out and the reason he gave was that it was not
appropriate for the courts in the UK to get involved in
consensual S/M behaviour in marital relationships.

>I've had to be creative and have found remote control TENS and
>dog collars particularly effective as a means of taking
>discipline out of the bedroom

Yes. We also find the shock collars quite useful for taking
crime and punishment and pleasure/pain out of the home. But
perhaps slavemale88 would be just as interested in indoor
punishment and discipline ideas.

sincerely,
David

Download "Games People Play" by David at
http://www.mschristine.com/manual.html